Should Be A Captain In There, Somewhere
by VioletCherry342
Summary: Kurtofsky Week Day 1: Pirates ... "And so they said,two pirates and the Beast's Beauty went on a mission, a mission for butterscotch!" Future!fic, Kurtofsky, fluff galore.. woohoo.


**~VioletCherry342~**

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_Day 1: Pirates_

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Kurt heard the small thud of a bedroom door closing and looked away from the mirror for a brief moment. He's not sure why he let his daughter select his and his husbands attire for the evening, because really, this outfit was going to drive him mad by the end of the night. But oh well. He would manage. Even if the frilly white shirt was puffy as a pillowcase and he didn't know how he was going wander about the neighborhood with a sleeveless shirt, he could handle this insanity to benefit his daughters wishes.

And really, he looked pretty good as a pirate.

He took the red and black striped tie out of the bag he'd been storing them in (this was Kurt Hummel, fashion designer, you didn't honestly think he'd gotten the costumes at Spirit Halloween, did you?) and wrapped it around his forehead. Goodness, he looked ridiculous. Like a second-hand pirate. A first mate. How insane was this. Ripped off sleeves and the brown pants, and now, this sweat-band-like tie...

"It's Halloween," Kurt reminded his reflection. "It's not like you're going out to dinner like this."

"Are you talking to yourself again, Will?" David asked, leaning in the doorway and smirking as his hubby turned around to admire the backside of him, groaning and tucking his ducktail underneath the hemline of his pants and tightening his belt again.

"No one else will speak to me, Jack," Kurt replied, smoothing out the non-existant wrinkles on his back pockets.

"There should be a 'Captain' in there, somewhere."

Kurt giggled and turned to face his husband, about to correct himself, but just ended up pausing, staring at David a moment before choking out a laugh. "Oh my God, David.."

"It was your daughters idea," He defended, chuckling.

"You're in a _wig_!" Kurt exclaimed, practically bending over backwards and laughing out loudly. "A-And a fake beard, oh my God."

David rolled his eyes, a little smirk curling his lips. "Shut up, you."

"You- look- Oh dear sweet God I can't, I _cannot_ deal."

David scoffed and practically scooped Kurt up before kissing him hotly, pinching his side. Kurt snickered, lifting a hand and tugging at the fake hair attached to the pirate hat. "I've always thought Jack Sparrow was sexy..."

"Captain," David said again. "Captain Jack Sparrow. God, Fancy, if you're gonna compliment me at least have your facts right."

"Oh, however could I make it up to you..." Kurt purred, resting his arm around David's neck and touching the strange looking beard hooked to his chin. "...Captain Sparrow?"

David rolled his eyes again and laughed, capturing Kurt's smart-mouth with his own, a hand rested on the small of his back.

Until the doorbell rang and ruined the moment. Kurt threw his head back and huffed, a hand still resting on the back of his neck as David pressed a tiny peck to his collarbone. "Ugh, what happened to the city?"

"Someone wanted kids," David said. "And kids can't grow up in a city in some dumpy apartment."

"My apartment was not dumpy!" Kurt said as David let him go and stepped away, then remembered who said that in the first place. "...Right."

David chuckled, kissing Kurt's cheek and stepping out of the bedroom, wandering down the stairs to answer the fifth trick-or-treaters in the past ten minutes. Kurt grumbled, fixing the tie around his head again and running his comb threw his hair again, fluffing in a way he would never consider acceptable on a regular day. He shook his head, sniffing at how he had once again made himself look like a twelve-year-old kid. This was a special talent he appeared to have.

"Papa?" A knock on the door interrupted his thoughts, his daughter peaking her head around cautiously. Kurt ceased in straightening the front of his shirt, again, to glance at her. "Yeah, baby girl?"

She just stared at him for a minute before stepping into the light, her bright yellow dress a little loose and her hair a fine mess. Kurt grinned at waved her forward, trying not to giggle at how she so eagerly bounded over to the highchair and waited for Kurt to assist her in getting up there. After all, she was the Princess here.

"All right," Kurt said, plugging in the curling iron and fixing her zipper for her.

"Did you see Daddy's beard?" She asked. "He looks like Cappie Jack!"

Kurt snorted. Even if he had argued with David for hours that Pirates of the Caribbean was not appropriate for a six-going-on-seven-year-old to watch, he came home to them playing pirates anyway. Hence the current ensemble he was in...

"I did see Daddy," Kurt said, hearing the doorbell ring again, but instead of 'Trick or Treat!" he heard Aunt Rachel saying something along the lines of "What in the name of God is on your face?" and he couldn't hold back a snicker. "I think Daddy looks cute with a beard, don't you?"

"Eww," Lizzy said. "Papa, you and Daddy should be cute on your own time."

Kurt bit the insides of his cheeks to stifle more giggles and just curled her brown hair around the iron. She looked a lot like her daddy; big hazel eyes and that innocent smile. Both Kurt and David agreed that if Rachel was going to be their surrogate (which only happened because of a lot of ranting and whining about how her and Kurt are family even after Finn and her relationship ended in the messiest divorce ever...), David needed to be the biological dad. Because honestly, combining Kurt and Rachel was just asking for a headache.

It took about a half an hour, all the while Elizabeth sat still like a perfect little girl and Rachel was laughing and David, in spite of being the object of mocking, was chuckling as well, but Kurt finally approved of Elizabeth's hairstyle. He nodded, helped her get into her shoes, and walked down the stairs.

"Aye," He said to the back of Rachel's head, watching as she doubled over and began laughing again when she caught sight of his costume. Considering she was Elphaba, it was quite strange. "Er, presenting Princess Elizabeth."

David grinned at the stairs as his daughter trotted down the last few, her glowing heals clacking the floor as she came down. "Belle, Papa!" Elizabeth said, quietly scolding. "Princess Belle."

"Lookie here," David said. "My little girl is really a princess."

Elizabeth positively preened under the attention, performing a little spin and curtsy for her fathers and aunt, beaming excitedly. "Are we ready?"

"Where's your bucket?" Rachel asked, finally gaining control of her giggle-fit. "You need a bucket for all that candy!"

"And you gotta give Daddy all the butterscotch ones," Kurt said, giving David an endearing look over the counter. "Cap'n Jack here gets very cranky without his butterscotch."

David scoffed and shoved Kurt's shoulder. "Excuse you, but I can duel for my own candies, thank you very much."

"Looks like you're in trouble, My Pretty," Rachel said, cackling for show. Elizabeth squeaked and rushed over by David, hiding behind his leg. "Daddy!"

David chuckled. "C'mon. We better be...settin' sail, before Rachel brings in the flying monkeys."

Kurt laughed, leaning over and kissing David's cheek as Rachel handed the Chip candy basket to Lizzy, before slipping his hand into his husbands and heading toward the door.

"And so they said," Rachel began, "two pirates and the Beast's Beauty went on a mission, a mission for _butterscotch_!"

"Shut up, you," Kurt chirped, giggling in spite of himself. "And don't eat all the Kit-Kats!"

"Meh, meh," She said, waving her hand at him. "One kids sacrifice is my only grasp to sanity."

Kurt shook his head but didn't comment further, smiling as David wrapped his arm around his waist and Elizabeth waited on the front porch until they caught up. "And let the pillaging..."

"...Begin!" David finished, getting a giggle out of Lizzy as they began their 'quest' down the streets of their New York suburban home.

Sure, this wasn't exactly where either of the boys thought they would be when they were thirty...but they wouldn't change it for a thing.

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**SO this isn't really pirate-y, but it was gonna be Day 7 and then I changed my mind and I don't know why because my laptop is dying (I'm on my mom's big one now...ugh) and I couldn't post it yesterday and URGH. Frustration...anyway...here. Have some teeth rotting fluff. I am going to feed my dogs and start Day 2 now! Yipee.**  
**Also, I know it's basically just fluff, but seriously...kind reviews here. And Happy Kurtofsky Week!**

**Also, sorry it's so late -_- RL...WAH.**


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